i moved to san diego a week ago, and it has already begun changing me and how i think. leaving dallas not only meant leaving all my friends, but leaving relationships behind at this place. the union gospel mission.

working in the kitchen there, i began some relationships with amazing men, who oddly enough, we were supposed to be encouraging in Christ. every single evening i went, i was astounded by their unrelenting faith and renewed vigor to live for Christ. they encouraged me more than they will ever know. and once, many of them were homeless or incarcerated. or both.

getting to my point, in san diego, there are homeless everywhere... maybe because southern california has incredible weather which never gets too cold or hot. as i came home to my apartment today, there was a homeless man going through our recycling bin. my first thought was to stop and ask him how he was doing. now, i admit that sounds silly. how do i think he's doing? he's homeless and rummaging through a recycling bin, looking for plastic and cans he can turn in for 5 cents each. probably not so good. but of course, i am thinking with the middle-class mind-set that a home and all the extra commodities are good. he may be fine with being homeless, and wouldn't have it any other way. BUT, i didn't stop. i walked on in like he wasn't there.
regardless of how he thinks of himself and his situation, it bothered me that i didn't stop and talk to him. before you freak out (castioni!), it bothers me that we (our society) has grown up being taught and will teach our children to beware of the homeless.!... they will ask for money... they are a nuisance.... it grieves me that yes, i sometimes treat them that way. i try to avoid them and shy away from them on the street. or possibly worse, i ignore them like i did this afternoon. yes, i am a hypocrite because i am not living like i believe and let my fear and society tell me how to behave.
i know people that are homeless are not a population that mainstream society doesn't think about all the time, unless like me, they may find them rummaging in the trash bin.
But along with God's other commands, He tells us "whoever oppresses the poor insults his Maker, but he who is generous to the needy honors Him" - Proverbs 14:31; and "whoever closes his ear to the cry of the poor will himself call out and not be answered" - Proverbs 21:13; and "she opens her hand to the poor and reaches out her hands to the needy" - Proverbs 31: 20, describing the Godly woman, and Proverbs 22:2, which reminds me i should treat all people equally, "the rich and the poor have this in common, the Lord is maker of them all."
thinking of how i am inconsistent in living what i believe saddens me, but i know i am human, and fail miserably sometimes. i know i have a God who gives second chances and still loves me in my imperfectness, which only gives me renewed hope that tomorrow will be different than today.